“Honor your father and mother. Then you will live a long, full life in the land the Lord your God is giving you.” (Exodus 20:12 NLT)
Today is Father’s Day, and of course, this famous commandment-plus-promise is prominent in my Bible app. When I log on to social media my feed will be full of tributes and someone will certainly say something about it at church in another couple hours. Before I breeze past this instruction into less triggering scriptures, I want to pause and consider it’s implication over my life. See, both my parents have passed, all my grandparents also. What is my responsibility in the receding wake of their lives? How do I honor my people after they’ve passed on?
After a bit of prayer, three simple tasks come to mind.
Speak their names. We’ve seen this in the news for the last several weeks; handmade posters bearing this sentence. Saying the name of our parent is an important part of keeping their story alive in our hearts. It hurts, at first. It’s almost impossible to pronounce their name without a puddle of tears in those first few weeks and months, but thankfully that gets easier as time passes and we keep trying. I believe as long as I speak about my parents, they are with me in some sense.
Share their memory. Don’t let your parents stories pass away along with them. Repeat the them, pass them on to the next generation. Both of my children were fairly young when their grandparents died, and we lived far away for most of their childhood. As a result, my kid’s memories of Grandma and Grandpa are few and far between. I try to fill in the gaps as much as I can, building an accurate and honorable portrait of who my parents were, so my children can more fully appreciate them.
Esteem their values. Perhaps the most powerful thing we can do to honor our parents is to continue to hold to their values. My mom and dad were honest, hardworking people. They went to church on Sunday and prayed every day between services. They were generous, considerate and compassionate. They were happy to help others and always had time to talk. I hold to these values myself and hope to pass them on to my children.
“Every time I think of you, I give thanks to my God.” (Philippians 1:30 NLT)
Dear Lord, today we lift up those who have lost fathers and maybe mothers, also. We ask that You would come close to the freshly bereaved and the still grieving alike. Stay near, speak comfort and courage as we seek to honor their loved one’s memory. May we be made richer by their stories and continue to honor their legacy. And may we be reunited one day with You. Amen.