“But they did not understand what He meant and were afraid to ask Him about it.” (Mark 9:32 NIV)
Jesus had gotten away from the crowd, alone with His disciples to do some important and sensitive teaching. (I’m picturing the very first church staff retreat.) Jesus shared the agenda that was most pressing on His heart: His impending persecution, death and resurrection. It seems He spoke plainly, but the disciples did not understand. What’s more, they lacked the courage to ask their questions.
My missionary friend on the other side of the world sent me this image before dawn this morning. I was gearing up for the day and she was winding down; we live the same day almost twelve hours apart. She and her husband teach English to unbelievers and today she shared a tool they utilize for conversation fodder.
Her message came through as I was considering the disciples stall-out on understanding their Savior’s teaching. It seems they were stuck in the fear zone. The Teacher was disclosing Kingdom mysteries ahead of their happening, but the disciples were too afraid to receive it. Whether it was fear of looking dumb or fear of finding out, they were locked up by the unknown and missed their opportunity to gain a better grasp on Jesus’ teaching. They did not understand and they did not possess the courage to ask Jesus just what He meant.
I remember seventh grade confirmation class with my own Pastor Mom as the teacher. On the very first Wednesday, amidst snacks and after-school chatter she shared the rules for our time together: “You can ask anything while we are together. There are no dumb questions.” I about choked on my powdered donut; didn’t my mom know that middle schoolers could ask crazy, off-track questions? Was she prepared for the onslaught of tom foolery about to be unleashed? But before I could offer any feedback my mom finished her train of thought, “If you have a question, then it’s likely that someone else in the room has the same question, so go ahead and ask it.”
I’ve thought about her statement for years now. If I have a question, some one else probably has the same question and I can be the one brave enough to ask it for all of us. Her wisdom is reinforced when I search online for some strange bible inquiry and Google fills in the blanks for me appropriately; someone else has wondered about the very thing I’m investigating. It’s good to wonder. God wants us to wonder, and what’s more, He hopes we’ll take those questions right to Him.
How might the gospels have played out if the disciples had taken their questions to Jesus while they had His undivided attention? What would have happened if they had admitted their lack of understanding and they’d spent another hour or an entire afternoon growing through the theology that was about to play out across the landscape of their lives? How might the disciples have encountered the cross and the sun going dark and the earthquake and black Saturday if they had only had the courage to say “I don’t get it, can You go over this again?”
Jesus is still available for us to ask questions. We can let fear of embarrassment or the answer keep us from asking, or we can push through our feelings to grab hold of greater understanding. Learning and growth happen on the other side of fear. Jesus is called ‘Teacher‘ for a reason. He’s still ready and willing to address all our questions.
“Call to me and I will tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know.” (Jeremiah 33:3 NIV)
Lord, we realize You long to tell us Kingdom things, things that feel fearful at first. Give us the courage to ask our questions. Help us stay in the conversation even when we don’t understand or like what we are hearting. Keep us from stalling out in fear, push us forward to growth. Amen.