“Then Thomas (also known as Didymus) said to the rest of the disciples, “Let us also go, that we may die with him.” (John 11:16 NIV)
A slow crawl through John 11 this morning has me thinking about Thomas. The synoptic gospels merely include him in the lists of disciples, but John cites him with a few sentences, giving us insight into Thomas’ personality.
Lazarus was sick and Jesus was still several days away. When He announced His intentions to to return to Judea, the disciples were not keep on the idea. They recalled the recently attempted stoning and knew the Pharisees patience with Jesus had run thin. Jesus didn’t back down, convinced this was an opportunity for the glory of heaven to shine through. Thomas, made a comment worthy of an action movie – essentially the first century version of “Today’s a good day to die.”
This little aside to the other disciples is the first glimpse of Thomas’ distinct personality that we get. Some scholars see it as a sign of bravery, but it reads to me more like an acquiescence. Thomas seemed to know that the Pharisees were ready to kill Jesus and that returning to Judea was a bad idea. Basically, he reasoned, if Jesus isn’t concerned about getting Himself killed, they may as well go with Him. Note that his remark wasn’t directed toward Jesus, but to the others. It’s the kind of comment we mutter when we are going along with the crowd but our heart isn’t really in it.
Later in the book of John, after the Last Supper but before Jesus’ arrest, Thomas asked a good question. Jesus had said He was going to prepare a place for His people and doubting Thomas piped up:
“Lord, we don’t know where You are going, so how can we go with You?” (John 14:6 NIV)
Jesus didn’t chastise Thomas. He didn’t harp on him for not listening or not believing. Instead He responded with some of the most powerful words in scripture:
“I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes through the Father except through Me.” (John 14:6 NIV)
We read of no response from Thomas. For all we know, he tucked these words in his heart and quietly watched the next few days unfurl. The soldiers came and arrested Jesus before dawn. The trial commenced. The crucifixion happened. The body of Jesus; the One who had resurrected Lazarus, laid dormant, dead for three full days.
And for some reason, Thomas was not with the disciples when Jesus appeared in the upper room. Everyone else was gathered together; locked in fear but Thomas was doing his own thing; grieving in his own way. He missed the first appearance of Jesus and was skeptical when he heard about it later. He didn’t receive the initial measure of the Holy Spirit that was breathed on the disciples that first Easter evening.
I’ve been studying the enneagram personality profiles this week, and I wonder if Thomas was a Five; the Investigator. He asked steadily inquired and he was slow to believe in here-say. He seemed to be driven by logic and straight thinking more than emotions. The gospel of John documents his doubt, but have we considered the rest of his story?
Thomas finally got his own interaction with Jesus. Just a week later, the disciples were locked in the room together again, this time they’ve managed to entice Thomas to stay with them. Jesus came and stood among them.
“Peace be with you!” Then He said to Thomas, “Put your finger here; see My hands. Reach out your had and put it into My side. Stop doubting and believe.” (John 20:26-27 NIV)
It seems that Jesus has arranged an in-person visit just for Thomas. The doubting disciple needed more evidence and Jesus had lovingly arranged to provide it. Thomas’ response was awesome.
“My Lord and my God!” (John 20:28 NIV)
We see in that moment that Thomas’s doubts are erased, replaced by firm confidence in a risen Savior. Of course, Jesus went on to say that those who believe without seeing will be more blessed than even this, but I’d bet Thomas felt pretty blessed in that moment, finally fully sure of Jesus as Lord. John wraps up his gospel with no further mention of Thomas or any other disciples.
Moving on into Acts, we know that Thomas was in the room on the day of Pentecost. He’s listed in the roll call, but beyond that, the Bible is silent on his account. Church history holds to a missionary journey of Thomas; sending him to the far-reaches of India to preach to a lost people.
When I consider Thomas, I see a man who is willing to ask hard questions. He was initially a skeptic, but when he finally fully believed, he was all in. Once his concerns were resolved, he wholeheartedly proclaimed the gospel to a far-off land.
Doubt isn’t going to disqualify us as long as we allow it to drive us further into Jesus’ presence. Thomas kept coming round until he was fully convinced of Christ’s Lordship. Then he spent the rest of his existence going to the ends of the earth to share the truth he’d found.
Lord, help us deal with our doubt. May we have the courage to bring our questions to You. Thank You for being faithful to reveal Yourself to Your disciples. May we emerge as confident Christ followers. Amen.