"What strength do I have, that I should still hope? What prospects, that I should be patient?" (Job 6:11 NIV)
Job had found himself living in a space where all his dreams had miscarried. Overnight, he’d lost his home, his holdings, his health and his heirs. He was reduced to to dust and ashes; left just alive enough to contemplate his losses. Job was mired in disappointment.
Disappointment is the gap between expectations and reality. When this gap widens, an ache fills it. There is a sense of loss and injustice as we measure the distance between what we hoped and what has actually happened. The greater the gap, the more we agonize. Remarkably, this gap is actually a sacred space: it is where we decide what we do with God. Job took his hurt directly to his Creator.
As I prayed about my own miscarried dreams this morning, the Lord brought to mind a classroom whiteboard mid-cleaning. Yesterday’s myriad of work was smeared, messy and mid-erase. Previous plans and hopes were smudged beyond recognition. While the board felt untidy and uncomfortable, it was clear, a purge was in progress. When the work was finished, the board would return to original status: clean and ready for use again.
Truth be told; I love a clean whiteboard. White boards are out of vogue, though. Most teachers cover them up with labels and calendars and smartboards, limiting the markability to very small windows of white space. For me, walking into a classroom with an unmarked, unobstructed writing space is a rare and exciting opportunity. At our last church, there was actually an empty classroom upstairs with a giant whiteboard I loved to utilize. I could map out a message, I could sketch a mural or assemble a timeline. I could teach almost anything on that empty space. Creators are not discouraged by blank spaces, they are inspired.
If our life is a whiteboard, God is not intimidated by the smear of our plans gone awry. He’s not intimidated by the marker streaks on the half-erased board or the blur of best intentions blown up. He is a Restorer and our messiest stretch of living is never beyond His ability to clean and purify. He is a Creator and He is always ready to begin again with a willing space, He never runs out of ideas or designs. If our ambitions did not go as planned, He is overjoyed to start over again.
"For we are God's masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the things He has planned for us long ago." (Ephesians 2:10 NLT)
Lord, please forgive us for forgetting Your ability to clean up and recreate. We get tied down by our torpedoed plans and devastated by disappointment. We lose sight of Your ability to restore and revamp. Help us surrender our dreams and disappointments, convinced of Your goodness and creativity. May we trust again in Your ability to redeem all things. Amen.