I attended another funeral yesterday. Though I did not know the man personally, there is no such thing as an easy funeral. Death always feels unfair to those left standing on the shore of eternity’s hazy abyss. The preacher shared the familiar text about Lazarus’ death and his grieving sisters. This time, though, I noticed the reaction of both Martha and Martha.
“Lord” Martha said to Jesus, “if You had been there, my brother would not have died.” (John 11:21 NIV)
“When Mary reached the place where Jesus was and saw Him she fell at His feet and said, “Lord, if You had been there my brother would not have died.” (John 11:32 NIV)
Mary and Martha played the awful grief game that we all succumb to at some point in our loss story: What If?
What if the biopsy had caught the irregularity years ago? What if they hadn’t gone that way? That day at that time? What if we had told them how we really felt? Or if we had gotten in their way? What if they hadn’t been drinking? What if they had gotten that promotion? What if they’d quit that position? What if they had turned around? Or seen that train coming? What if they had missed their appointment with death and they were still here with us?
We tend to tumble from the ‘What If’ questions into the ‘Why’ questions, which are far above our pay grade and hopelessly laced with pain. What if and why, left to their own devices, will grate against our faith, slowly abrading the very substance that makes loss survivable.
‘What If’ is a query grief insists upon. Mary and Martha each felt it’s provocation and so will we. The question is, where does ‘What if?’ get us? What good does it accomplish? In my experience, ‘What If’ only casts long shadows of doubt across my perception of God’s sovereignty and goodness.
I find it interesting that both of these women ardently believed that if Jesus had been in the room, their brother would have still been there. They each possessed great faith in Jesus’ ability to heal sick people. Perhaps they had forgotten that Jesus could heal across time and space: the centurion’s servant never even saw His face, yet he was fully restored.
Additionally, it occurs to me that people die in the presence of Jesus all the time: both historically as He walked the earth and presently. We know that Joseph (Jesus’ step-father) did not live long enough to see his son’s earthly ministry come to fruition. Jesus was surely near, perhaps even bedside, and able as Joseph breathed his last, but He did not intervene in His earthly father’s passing from this world to the next. There was no healing or resurrection for Jesus’ immediate family despite His indisputable love for them..
I’ve been in the room with death many times now and I almost always perceive the presence of Jesus in our midst. And still, holy people pass. We pray, we believe healing is possible. Sometimes it happens, and many other times, the saints go marching Home. The more I have come to believe and understand about heaven the less I can blame them.
Sometime the miracle we desire and even possess the faith to see is not the miracle that God has in mind. In the case of Lazarus, the miracle God had in mind was greater still. We can trust Jesus for healing, but can we trust Him for resurrection?
Jesus went to the grieving women’s home, He sat with them in their loss (“Jesus wept.” John 11:35) and then He spoke life to their dead brother. Lazarus wasn’t near-dead like Peter’s mother-in-law or even a little dead like Jairus’ daughter. Lazarus was dead-dead, four long days dead. And Jesus called Lazarus out of the grave and back to life.
“Jesus called in a loud voice, “Lazarus, come out!” The dead man came out, His hands and feet wrapped with strips of linen, and a cloth around his face. Jesus said to them, “Take off the grave clothes and let Him go.”” (John 11:43-44 NIV)
To the glory of God, Lazarus was resurrected. A healing would have been nice, but a resurrection was awesome! Emotionally taxing for the family, but terrific press coverage for the Kingdom!
“Did I not tell you that if you believe, you will see the glory of God?” (John 11:40 NIV)
Belief is always rewarded, even if the reward is a long time coming. We look to Lazarus as a type of every believer. Jesus was able to breath life back into Lazarus, just as He will for us one day. Jesus proved His authority over life and death so we would have faith that He is able.
When we stand at the grave of our loved one, tempted to play the ‘What If’ game, we do well to remember that whatever God has allowed will ultimately be for His glory. If they have passed away, our loved on is now resurrected. Just because we can’t see it, doesn’t make it any less true. Lazarus proves to us what Christ is capable of and what is already happening across the sea, just beyond the border of heaven. Because God operates outside of time and space, our loved one is alive and well and God is getting all the glory for the great things He has done.
When we play the ‘What If’ game, we wrestle with the authority of God. If Mary and Martha had gotten their way they would have gotten a nice little healing but they would have missed the resurrection altogether. ‘What If’ is a waste of breath; God is sovereign and He is doing great things. If it’s not good yet it’s because He’s not done yet. We struggle to fathom the things that are yet to come, but the Word of God promises there is a resurrection coming for every human frame that places their faith in Him.
“Brothers and sisters, we do not want you to be uninformed about those who sleep in death, so that you dod not grieve like the rest of mankind, who have no hope. For we believe the Jesus died and rose again, and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in Him. According to the Lord’s word, we tell you that we are who are still alive, who are left until the coming of the Lord, will certainly not precede those who have fallen asleep. For the Lord Himself will come down from heaven, with a loud command, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet call of God and the dead in Christ will rise first. After that, we who are still alive and are left will be caught up together in the air. And so we will be with the Lord forever. Therefore encourage on another with these words.” (1 Thessalonians 4:13-18 NIV)
Lord, forgive us for our human response of ‘What If?’ We have a hard time seeing past the dust and din of today. We know You are good, loving and kind. We know that You are a God of healing and restoration. Help us trust You also for resurrection. It’s too wild to be true, but Your Word promises a second act for each person that places their hope in You. Let us trust the process; even when it includes disease, destruction and death. We know that You are able to make all things new. Amen.