“In spite of this, you did not trust in the Lord your God…”
(Dueteronomy 1:32 NIV)
In spite of what?
This verse immediately follows the verse we expounded on yesterday – the one where God promises to lead His people and fight for them, He reminds them of their exodus from Egypt and their provision in the wilderness. He promises to continue to carry them until they reached the Promised Land.
In spite of all this, they did not trust the Lord.
We can point fingers and throw shade at the insolent Israelites or we can recognize our own tendency to distrust. We can examine the heavy folds of our hearts for infractions against God. We have our own in spite ofs, don’t we? In spite of our salvation story. In spite of His ongoing grace over our trespasses. In spite of His provision and protection. In spite of His faultless track record. In spite of His unwavering faithfulness, we still struggle to trust. I’ll own it – I still struggle to trust.
I think of the epileptic boy and the father who brought his son to Jesus’ attention, inquiring about a healing.
“I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief.” (Mark 9:24 NIV)
The posture of this desperate dad is a great example for all of us. He believed, yet he was honest about his struggle. He asked Jesus for help, to fill and reinforce the gaps in his faith. And he saw a miracle as a direct result of his humble request.
I don’t believe God expects us to have instant and unflappable faith. He remembers we are dust. He’s well-acquianted with our struggle, familiar with the faulty sin-scarred nature of our frame. I wonder if He’d appreciate our honesty along with our effort? “Lord, I want to believe. Please help me believe.” seems like it goes a long way with Him.
Lord, today we see our own struggles to trust and obey. We recognize our own patterns of unfaithfulness in the words and actions of the Israelites. We repent for all the times we’ve failed to trust, in spite of Your unmarred record with humanity. Please forgive us. We have faith but we also have so much room for faith to grow. Help us be honest about our lack and eager to ask for more. May we see miracles as we mature in our walk with You. Amen.